Girl. Woman. Chick. Broad. Lady. Bitch. Babe. Mom. Sis. She. Her.

Women. We’re called many things. Over the last hundred years, we’ve made great strides towards true equality with men. We’re mothers, sisters, aunts, daughters, grandmothers, girlfriends, wives, and partners. We are invincible!

But once EVERY DAMN MONTH…gruh. It should be made a law that a woman on her period gets any damn thing she wants. ANYTHING. Free chocolate? No problem. A massage? Coming right up. Someone’s head on a pike? Let me get my hacksaw.

If the raw, unfettered hormonal energy of a woman on her period could be harnassed, we wouldn’t need to drill for oil. Solar, wind, and nuclear (Say it with me, Governor Palin, NEW-CLEE-ER) plants would be abandoned. America, nay, the entire world would run on bitch power!

I’m in favor of this completely. Let’s stop looking for a true cure for erectile disfunction and hop aboard the lady-power train!

This could be the best discovery since caoco beans. Aw man, now I want a Hershey bar.


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