If this week got any bigger, I’d have to start cracking jokes

Is this a big week? Does the pope have a balcony? Fourteen books this time around, god help me. Well, let’s just jump right in.

The fail train rides again! Actually, and I’ll deny saying it later, this week wasn’t terrible. With the exception of the Firestorm pages, this issue combined the few things I like about Brightest Day. The J’onn story has been keeping me on the edge of my seat, and it really came to a head now that he’s confronted psycho Martian chick, D’kay D’razz. She’s the exact meaning of the term mindfuck and I can’t believe I’m saying this, but check out the issue yourself for the twist of all twists the last five pages. A brick was shat.

What is it about the Bat-women that rocks so hard? Of the Bruce Wayne: The Road Home one-shots that have come out so far, only Batgirl and Catwoman have been truly excellent. I’m not a Batfan, really I’m not, but something about the Dark Knight’s leading ladies always reels me in. You go, girls. You go.

On the opposite side of the spectrum is the Commissioner Gordon one-shot. Jim has never been one of my favorite Bat-guys, but he’s pretty badass for a powerless man in his 50’s. Even though the issue was written by Adam ‘Sonuva’ Beechen, I dug it. Go ahead and check it out, if you’ve got the time to spare.

Legion of Superheroes is finally getting good for me. I think it was all the Green Lantern stuff and Earth Man-centric issues that were spoiling it for me. Legion has always been about having a large, rotating cast of characters, not fixating on just one or two. Anyway, rant over. I’m gonna call this issue “couples a-go-go”, because everyone is making out. Seriously, this issue was full of romance. Shady and Earth Man, Ultra Boy and Phantom Girl, Gim and Yera, Garth and Imra, Ayla and Salu…no, seriously. It was a cute nod to the Pre-Crisis Legion stories where they were lovers. Hopefully this is canon again, the Legion needs more lesbians.

I don’t normally pick up Superman/Batman. I mean, I get backissues from conventions and tent sales, and my boyfriend buys the trades, but I don’t follow it regularly. I may have to, though, if all the issues are as funny and interesting as #77 was. Any Supergirl/Robin teamup is worth picking up, but a Kara/Damian teamup? Oh, yes please. My only complaint is that he never once calls her fat. He calls her an alien constantly, though, in true Dami fashion. I love that kid.

Justice League is growing on me again. I haven’t read anything from the main JL series since Cry For Justice (BOOOOOOOO), but since starting last month, I’m cursing the fact that I can’t seem to put it down. The Crime Syndicate of Amerika is back, y’all! Also, Tangent Earth Green Lantern makes an appearance. I’m telling you, I’m getting some heavy JLA-esque vibes from this current arc. I hope I’m wrong, because that arc of the old JLA series sucked. This issue, while text-heavy like whoa, was actually pretty readable. Let’s hope this trend continues.

I haven’t followed Gen13 for two issues now…so what the hell happened?! Last time I checked in with them, the Gens were in, like, the frozen wastelands, and Roxy and Grunge were going into space. I’m totally confused. Ah, well. Next weekend is the tent sale at Tate’s, and backissues that aren’t under the tent are half off inside the store. I’ll go grab them if I can’t find them outside, and hopefully clear up my confusion.

Is it just me, or are the Teen Titans stories the only decent ones in the Holiday Specials that DC puts out? Unless you plan on spending $5 for one story, I suggest skipping it.

Reading a Grant Morrison book is a double-edged sword. On one hand, it could be the best thing you’ve ever read. On the other hand, it could be so completely nonsensical that your head does a 360-spin trying to keep up. I think the entire latest issue of Batman and Robin was just a lead up to the fact that Dr. Thomas Wayne is actually, wait for it, Dr. Tommy Elliot. Big shocker, right? Tommy is a notorious face-stealer, and they share the same name, so…ahem. Moving on,

Remember how I said that Bat-ladies could do no wrong? Well, I feel the opposite for Superman’s supporting female cast. Lana Lang is a lovestruck bimbo, Cat Grant is a self-possessed bitch, Supergirl is the new DCU emo kid, Power Girl is being written by Judd Winick (WINIIIIIIIIICK), Lois Lane spent 50 years trying to get Superman to marry her…I swear, the only decent female character that’s come out of the Supercast recently is Bizarrogirl. And maybe Mercy Graves, who was badass in the Infinity Inc series post-52. If there is one thing I can say about this issue of Supergirl, it’s that it was drawn incredible well. The page comparing Supergirl and Bizarrogirl was superb. And that last page, with Cat Grant? Mascara tracks have never looked so good.

Power Girl confuses me. It looks like Judd Winick (WINIIIIIIIIICK) has been taking banter cues from Keith Giffen, but aside from that…is Peeg hitting on her new info man Nicco? What’s with the lady-reveal on the last page? Seriously, who the hell is she. Looks kinda like a badly-drawn Atlee, except she’s supposed to be a Kryptonian. I’m gonna write this issue off as “Confusing as Hell” and call it a day, mmkay?

Is there anything better than seeing someone slug Sinestro? In a Green Lantern series, no. In Green Lantern Corps, maybe. In a final page splash shot? You bet your ass there isn’t. I love Green Lantern Corps. Tony Bedard is honestly one of the coolest comic writers I’ve ever met, if not one of the best comic writers DC employs (sorry, Gail). His natural element seems to be space, because he was obviously born there. Don’t believe me? No one but a star-traveller could write space stories this well, I’m convinced. This new arc is going to be focused around Soranik and Kyle (didn’t I predict that?), and the weaponers of Qward. Looks promising, I can dig it.

Okay, so, lemme get this straight. The Steve Rogers that invited Deadpool to be part of his team last issue was an imperfect clone built by a man named Doctor Bong?! Seriously?! Deadpool, you have a terrible taste in friends. Next issue.

Hey, some of you may have heard of this comic-turned-movie from a couple years ago? About a kid that made himself into a superhero in a setting like the world we live in? I think it was called Kick-Ass? I have the first issue of the second series in my hands. Care to come along for the ride? Two words for you: Justice Forever. What is it, you ask? A TV show? A comic series? No, my friends. It’s the main plot of the new Kick-Ass series, the superteam he joins. Yes, an honest to god superteam. I’m going to stand up in a minute, and I won’t be surprised at all if I find a brick on my chair.

Well, that’s this week in comics, ladies and gents. I myself have a date with Gaia Online’s Exchange forum. Hope to see you all back here next week, same time, same place. Peace.

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1 Response so far »

  1. 1

    david said,

    “Power Girl confuses me. It looks like Judd Winick (WINIIIIIIIIICK) has been taking banter cues from Keith Giffen,”

    IMO, Giffen has never been as funny as people say he is.
    POWER GIRL is actually funny without being silly.

    ” What’s with the lady-reveal on the last page? Seriously, who the hell is she. Looks kinda like a badly-drawn Atlee, except she’s supposed to be a Kryptonian. I’m gonna write this issue off as “Confusing as Hell” and call it a day, mmkay?”

    She looks exactly like Power Girl except with dark hair. She’s a new villain and obviously will be explained next issue.
    Truly–How was anything confusing in this issue?


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