I’m happy with this week’s haul. This worries me.

It’s that time again! Sorry to sound like an awful children’s program, but I’m a little excited about this weeks lineup. Hopefully, some of my excitement is rubbing off on you, and you decide to read onward.

As always, Flashpoint minis and tie-ins will be reviewed in one block.

I’m not sure how much I enjoy Emperor Aquaman. I mean, it’s an Aquaman book, that should speak for itself. I just don’t care for the guy. But lately, it’s like the universe has been trying to force me to like him. Killing off Garth, elevating Mera to new levels of kickass…it’s honestly getting hard to be able to say, “Fuck everyone that lives below the ocean, land is where the cool people live.” And don’t get me wrong, there are definitely some things about this title that make me rage (Tara Markov and Helena Bertinelli are both Female Furies that serve Wonder Woman?! England is essentially a male concentration camp?!), but it’s just, it’s not bad. I feel so conflicted.
It seems to be ‘everyone try and take over the Ravager’ day in the Deathstroke book. Not a great issue, truth be told. There was a big deal made over Slade getting his crew mostly killed, but no big reason as to why we should care. Good first issue, not so good second, the third better be awesome.
I like the Citizen Cold book quite a bit. Lots of cameos from Flash history. For instance, anyone else remember Chunk, the scientist with the black hole in his body? How about Fallout, who powered Iron Heights for a time during the reign of Warden Wolfe? The one thing that really irked me about this issue, and this is a spoiler, is that apparently, yeah, Wally West is dead in this universe. If Flashpoint is supposed to be a gateway to the new 52 come September, does that mean that he’s going to cease to exist? Anyone who knows me knows that I’m not the biggest fan of Wally West but let’s face it, he was always the more compelling Flash.
Fuck the United States government in this world. Fuck it extremely hard in the ear until its collective brain turns to oatmeal. That’s all I have to say about this issue of Booster Gold. I just, I can’t even right now. I can’t.
We now return you to your scheduled programming.

Oh wow. Oh wow. It’s like my eyes and brain had sex with this comic, because holy god. Long, spoiler-filled story short, Hal Jordan isn’t a Green Lantern anymore. Sinestro is. And I, I think I’m going to cry because oh my god were the circumstances just amazing and-
Okay, Geoff. You win. I’ll read a monthly Sinestro book, no problem. You win.
Meanwhile, in Green Lantern Corps…John Stewart killed Mogo. This is the second planet he’s destroyed. Are we focusing on this? Nope, he and a rookie are going to go on a mission to stop war on the planet, get this, Vorrin-Tog. Yup, I’ve got my own planet. Anyway, I like this issue. Green Lantern Corps is supposed to be about Lanterns other than the ones from Sector 2814, and this Qurina character seems interesting. I hope they keep her around.

Batgirl is a consistently good title. Pretty much every issue is worth the cover price, if not more. But what do you get when you have one Batgirl versus five people in super suits? The beginning of an epic team-up. Stargirl, Miss Martian, Bombshell, and Supergirl guest star as what I’ve dubbed ‘team kickassia’. But what I didn’t see coming, for once, was the last page. Someone hired the Reapers to off a guy. The guy? Daddy Brown, of course! As someone who always wanted to see Cluemaster pulled apart by trains, I’m actually pleased by this ending, and where it could go from here.

Red Robin was the second book this week to make me close the book with a resounding ‘What?!’. Okay, so, Cass is still a good guy, Tim wears pints of his own blood on his back, there’s a kid that can fight better, and faster, than Cass, Tam was in love with Tim’s masked identity, and Tim killed Captain Boomerang? That’s one run-on sentence full of WHAT.

I love legacy heroes, and flashback issues. Guess what Birds of Prey is doing this month? It’s time for a trip back to post-War times with Lady Blackhawk and the original Phantom Lady, Sandra Knight, featuring a cameo by the first Dinah Lance. And of course, it’s an arc featuring Nazis. Nazis, to comics, are like the ultimate Earthbound evil, am I right? Anyway, it’s a great issue, though it’s not penned by Gail Simone, but with a cover, and interior art, by Billy Tucci, I don’t care. Can this be the new artist for BoP? Please?

I know I’ve said this before, but I adore Solstice. She’s a nice, normal girl…who happens to have superpowers. She’s a good balance to those angst-buckets who call themselves Teen Titans. Once again, Raven is being a mope. Seriously, what is with this chick? Always spoiling a good time. [Please take note: I’m taking the mick out of Raven because I can; I don’t actually bear any ill will towards the character.] And look, Tim is showing humility! Is it Christmas already?! All joking aside, this was a fantastic issue. I’m looking forward to the relationships that will be established between Solstice and the rest of the Teen Titans…until September, when she’ll be wiped out of existence.

That was this week in comics! I’ve got a bit of a ride ahead of me, so I’ve got to get going now. But I’ll be here again next week, same time, same place. Ta!

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